Tag Archives: belgian beers

#240 – Crack Pils

#240 - Crack Pils

Size: 250 ml

ABV: 5 %

If there was ever a more appropriately named Belgian beer to take to an illegal rave than Crack Pils, then it hasn’t been brewed yet. I saw this tacky little lager sitting all alone on a dusty shelf in the old den Zytholog shed in Adegem. I wouldn’t be the first person in the world, and certainly won’t be the last to be tempted by both Crack and Pills.

It’s all very well to smugly sit here and make wisecracks about hard narcotics but perhaps the irony is that the beer we drink and read and write about is a drug. The general classification for a drug is simply ‘any substance which when absorbed into a living organism may modify one or more of its functions’. You could equally argue that vitamins and hormones are similarly classed as drugs, but they don’t quite elicit the same bodily effects as a good skinful of booze.

Anti-alcohol activists, of which there are many, would have you believe that alcoholic beverages are on a par with illegal street drugs such as Crack. Your average beer drinker might tend to disagree but it is worth looking at a few facts before immediately writing off such claims. A number of recent studies in the US have claimed that excessive alcohol consumption is associated with approximately 75,000 deaths per year, and that 41% of all deaths from motor vehicle crashes involved alcohol. How tenuous these links are is up for discussion, however you only have to be in city centres at closing time these days to see for yourself the carnage which alcohol can cause. The studies continue to allege that alcohol abuse in our youth tends to lead to academic and occupational problems, as well as physical violence and illegal behaviour. Long term alcohol misuse is also proven to be associated with liver disease, cancer, cardiovascular disease and neurological damage, as well as psychiatric problems such as depression, anxiety and personality disorders. Bleak stuff.

This isn’t just a US issue either. A recent journal article in the Lancet in the UK claimed that alcohol is the most dangerous drug, ahead of both heroin (2nd), and cocaine (3rd). The basis of the claims centre on both the harm to the individual and on society of excessive alcohol consumption. It’s a convenient point of view for those who wish to take advantage of the situation and increase taxes further, or censor advertising although there is almost certainly no smoke without fire. Sitting here in my ivory tower drinking this hideous little beer it’s easy to point the finger at the rest of society but then I began to recall nights when I wrestled a police officer to the ground after a pub crawl, charged at a group of riot police in Ghent, urinated against a police station door in Antwerp, and stole a boat and had to be rescued by life-boats about a mile out to sea (#76). I like to consider myself a pretty upstanding member of society and so alcohol clearly has something to answer for.

The moral of this story is clearly don’t do Crack, don’t do Pills, and more importantly whatever you do don’t do Crack Pils, or SAS Export, West Pils, Suma Pils or any other pseudonyms of this beer that may exist.

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Filed under 4, Leroy, Pilsener

#238 – Bosprotter

#238 - Bosprotter

Size: 330 ml

ABV: 8.5 %

Some time ago I asked Jef Goetelen, the brewmaster and owner of t’Hofbrouwerijke if he could explain the story behind the names of some of his beers. It is often a quandary to monolinguistic people like me trying to write about beers written and made in another language. I’m glad I asked, as I wasn’t expecting Bosprotter to be a reference to people that fart in the forest.

Whilst clearing ones pipes in a designated outdoor area is probably more eco- and family-friendly than not, I was relieved to hear that the term forest-farter has a less literal meaning when translated from Flemish to English. A bosprotter is a mountain-biker, and when Jef isn’t brewing beer, and whilst his brews are fermenting each week he and his fellow bosprotters can often be found in the woods getting muddy and scaring the local wildlife!

The Bosprotter was Jefs first proper beer, and the odd title for a beer is one which is symbolic of Jefs approach to brewing, which he sees as more of a hobby than a full time job. Jefs love of forest-farting is no different to his love of brewing beer, which considering the professional set up of equipment at t’Hofbrouwerijke is surprising – Jef rebuilt his entire house to accommodate the current brewing facilities. Jef may only consider his brewing to be a hobby but many of his beers have met with high acclaim. This is clearly a result of having good kit and having practiced for many years getting it right, but I will save that story for maybe the next beer.

The Bosprotterin question which took a little while to pour and settle, was a proper home-made Tripel. It was evident that it was unfiltered and unpasteurised and underneath the slowly dissipating head sat a rich golden coloured beer. There was definitely some unique sweet and spicy flavours in there which was professionally accompanied by some good old fashioned maltiness. The beer tended to fade somewhat the longer it was in the glass which was a bit of a shame, but I’d still say it’s worth a shot if you see it in sitting on the shelves. The newer labels should easily identify it now, and at least back up the title of the beer more appropriately with what looks like an old fart in the forest making beer!

Bosprotter's new identity

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Filed under 7, Abbey Tripel, t'Hofbrouwerijke

#237 – du Boucanier Christmas

#237 - du Boucanier Christmas

Size: 330 ml

ABV: 9.5%

When you drink 9.5% beers it tends to have an effect on your mental faculties. Of course the range of dysfunction will tend to depend on the number of 9.5% beers consumed however it certainly takes less of these to get to that happy maladjusted state. Once I had got around to polishing off the Biere du Boucanier Christmas I was keen to ask the question – so how do pirates celebrate Christmas?

It’s not something I’m sure many people have ever thought about and once I was sober again I realised it was a stupid question. I have to admit to searching on Google in the extremely optimistic hope that somebody had published a university paper on the subject. Aside from finding a plethora of Christmas carols which had been butchered to fit a jaunty nautical theme or a number of children’s storybooks I found very little. What was I hoping for? A Christmas tree plundered from an island and tied to the mast? Boozed up buccaneers passed out around the wireless waiting for the Kings speech?

I am surprised though that the marketeers haven’t yet cashed in on the festive piratical theme when it comes to the du Boucanier range of beers – they seem to have covered everything else. The beers are brewed by Van Steenberge but marketed and distributed by a company called Icobes. The portfolio of beers consists of the Blonde Ale, a Red Ale (#27), a Dark Ale (#174), and this Christmas Ale. There is also a Buccaneer Old Reserve beer which seems to use the same theme but is actually the same beer as the Bornem Tripel. This is also the same brewery which makes the much tastier Piraat 9 (#15), and Piraat 10.5. Clearly somebody at Van Steenberge likes pirates, and Icobes certainly feel there is a market given the merchandise available.

The beers, in particular the flagship (excuse the pun) Blonde Ale are sold in anything from 33cl bottles, six pack gift boxes and 750ml bottles, to Magnums, Jeroboams and the mighty Salmanazar. These are largely for one-off brews such as the Grand Reserve 3rd Millenium, and the Grand Reserve Prestige du Brasseur, although I have never seen any of these and given the dated nature of the company website can only assume the novelty of the du Boucanier beers has waned in recent years. If anyone wants to put this to the test the following can be ordered for Christmas presents:- T shirts, baseball caps, posters, mirrors, enamelled pins, picture frames, bandannas and shawls, as well as the regular beer mats, gift sets and beer glasses. You can also buy the boot shaped 0.5l glass which was discovered in the du Boucanier Dark Ale (#174). I rarely see these beers anymore although still cling to the hope of trying the popular Blonde Ale some day.

The Christmas beer itself though was really quite disappointing. While the Red and the Dark Ales hadn’t exactly been seminal brews they did at least have some redeeming features, whereas this high strength amber could and should have delivered so much more. It’s a style of beer that I am particularly fond of, but there was very little flavour to the beer, aside from a pineapple tinge and the extra strength offered no increase in character in any way. It will get you pissed though which is at least something when you have had enough of the relatives on Christmas day.

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Filed under 5, Belgian Strong Ale, Christmas Beer, Van Steenberge

#236 – Witkap Pater Dubbel

#236 - Witkap Pater Dubbel

Size: 330 ml

ABV: 7 %

It’s difficult to drink beer in Belgium and not be touched by the hand of God somewhere along the way. I have lost track over the past couple of hundred brews how many times I have come across abbeys, monks and monasteries. The beer from the Witkap range which I previously tried was the Tripel (#94) which led me to investigate the Cistercian monk from the label. I have already met Benedictines, Carmelites (#229), and Trappists and so I thought I’d use the Witkap Pater Dubbel to try and make some sense of some of these monastic classifications.

There are essentially two main categories of order; Contemplative, and Non-Contemplative. I will deal with the former first, which contain the bulk of the orders you will come across while drinking Belgian beers ie the Trappists, Carmelites, Carthusians and Cistercians. Contemplative orders are those who have given their lives to God but with minimal interaction with the outside world. Although they seek not to talk to the world, by praying they hope to save those very souls they shy away from. There are three main types who can all be traced back to their founders – the Benedictines from St Benedict (525), the Carmelites who formed at Mount Carmel (circa 14th Century), and the Carthusians from St Bruno (11th Century).

Benedictine orders typically reside in communities but have limited interaction, although they do interact with each other. This in contrast to the austere Carthusians whose monks isolate themselves even from their fellow brothers. Carmelites tend to be somewhere in the middle, although of course it is impossible to simplify these orders too much. To confuse matters even more it is worth pointing out that in fact the Cistercians formed as a splinter group from the Benedictines and that the Trappists have over time diverged from the Cistercians. Both groups sought a more literal interpretation of the Benedictine doctrine and both choose their vocation with subtle differences. Trappists tend to make a living from the production of goods for the public and have thrived whereas the insulated lives of the Benedictines and Cistercians haven’t.

The other Order, those Non-Contemplatives, are also known as Active Orders. These are the communities of monks who tend to have more direct interaction with the outside world. They are less bound by the walls of the monastery and rather than being self-supportive often tend to live off the charity of others. The two main types are the Franciscans, formed by St Francis (13th Century), and the Dominicans, hailing from St Dominic (also 13th Century). The former live a simple life with the main aim of giving aid to the poor through prayer and good works, whereas the latter have taken a more educational stance towards engaging and training society to look after itself.

It would be insulting to those involved to suggest it is in anyway as simplistic as this. Each monastic community across Belgium and the world will act and live to its own particular custom, but it does give the beer drinker a perspective on the colourful background which accompanies each brew. In the case of the Witkap Pater Dubbel, the history is probably a little more interesting than the actual beer, which was a standard malty double, with a fair level of carbonation and a sharp spicy finish. Fairly enjoyable but hardly worth writing about – unless of course you try to disseminate thousands of years of monastic life into a few paragraphs!

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Filed under 7, Abbey Dubbel, Slagmuylder